B23
Public Record
Excerpt from novel: with Abandon

i am jealous for You.

if god says he's jealous then
my jealousy for You is godlike.

my love is aggressive in its generosities.
i want to force-feed You joy
until You are so stuffed with the stuff
that We spend the rest of the night
rolling on the floor, holding Our stomachs,
and You're saying
'oh god I'm so full.
how could you let this happen
I should have stopped so long ago'
and You're trying to sound angry
but You can't stop giggling
and dripping tears from giggling.

and We'll be lying there
in complete agony,
praying to every god
and inanimate idol,
that Our seams don't give out
because everything just feels
so expansive and meaninglessful.
this is how life should be
We decide, rolling on the floor,
holding the seams of Our stomachs shut.
gluttonously joyful.

Frida Bilson