B30
Public Record
Excerpt from novel: with Abandon

Abandon was at the front door

and as I met its eyes,
in the theater seats to my subconscious
i picture myself lying with an ear to the ground
facing a steam roller
as it crawls slowly toward me
and I smile
as its coldly rolling ten-tonnes
push my nose into the asphalt
and massage my cheekbones into soil
as much road as road;
until all of the pressure
swallows every nerve ending and my
self splashes out the back of me
making an isosceles of mushy smarts
while the roller keeps rolling,
painting red triangles
every four meters.
I am content;
as much road as road
the lowest I could ever be.

this isn't me
who is this
this isn't me
this isn't me

Frida Bilson